29 June 2007

Confused

I caught parts of the BET awards on TV the other night and was surprised to see Jennifer Hudson win in the Best New Artist category. I was a little confused seeing that she was nominated alongside MIMS, Corrine Bailey Rae, Gnarls Barkley and Lupe Fiasco who all had released albums in the year under review. Has she released an album, or does the soundtrack for ‘DreamGirls’ qualify her? Or maybe what what I really should be pondering is the definition of 'artist' with respect to the category she won for. I must admit that I have had cause to be somewhat confused when it comes to categories and qualifications for said categories when it comes to award shows. Remember when Craig David was nominated in the same category two consecutive years (2002, 2003) for songs (Fill Me In, 7 Days) from his 'Born To Do It' album? I guess he rode the coat tails of the UK release date versus US release date technicality on that one. I still think he deserved to win the grammy both times though.

Non Surgical Facelift

These oyinbo people are slow o, they are just catching on to the face lifting powers of hair braiding! I had to laugh as I watched this report on accesshollywood the other day. Why do they think us beautiful women from the African continent never look our ages? Yeah (good) black don't crack and whatever does manage to crack we be repairing (albeit temporarily) by braiding our hair creating smooth skin on our foreheads, temples and the nape of our necks. As a matter of fact 'Threading' is another hair preparation method that serves a double purpose. Of course beauty is pain and nothing is as painful as having the misfortune of getting your hair braided/threaded by a person with an excessively firm grip. Panadol does come in handy for the headache, and the pain will go away with time. If you are lucky thats all you will get, a real unlucky person gets the bumps too. aarrgghhh!!! The bumps!!!! Nasty little painful things and they can be the most unsightly mess oozing pus and all.

Lauryn, O Lauryn

Can You imagine that 10 years after her debut album (The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill) we are still awaiting her sophomore album? I heard a couple of months ago that contrary to what we all believe (i.e. she has been undergoing a 9yr plus mental breakdown) Lauryn has been recording and she has an impressive body of never before seen nor heard work not exactly rivaling Prince (but coming close). I also heard Columbia was refusing to release her sophomore album for not very clear reasons. Lauryn had a concert this past Wednesday in California and if reports of the said concert are anything to go by, I am beginning to see why we will have to wait a bit longer for the much awaited sophomore album. The new material is supposed to be un-inspiring and apparently Lauryn's pipes are rusty. Incidentally I have been listening to the 'Miseducation' album for about two weeks now, I LOVE that album (from 'Lost Ones', 'Ex-factor', 'To Zion', 'Doo Wop', 'Forgive Them Father', Every Ghetto Every City', and her cover of the Frankie Vallie hit 'Can't Take My Eyes of You') and I have been seriously wondering if Lauryn would ever be able to atleast match her debut effort and preferably surpass it. I just pray she gets herself together and puts something out she is so talented and I just love her voice. Love you Lauryn, I will continue to pray for you, you be aight.

Concert review: Lauryn Hill show in Oakland a fiasco
mercurynews.com

Lauryn Hill's Paramount Theatre show gets off to a rocky start
sfgate.com




28 June 2007

Joblessness

You can usually tell a persons ‘place of origin’ in the US from the first 3 digits of their cell number. Mine of course gives away my Texas origins. I have had a couple of friends who have changed their numbers every time they moved from state to state I am very lazy and have often wondered why they bother. On Friday I found motivation to do the same.

I usually listen to the radio on my ride into work. When I bought my car the sales person tuned the radio to 102.7 Kiis FM ‘this is my favorite station’ she proclaimed as she fiddled with the buttons. ‘How nice’ I thought. I later realized she was scamming me out of noticing that the cd player was broken. Or maybe she wasn’t. Anyhow I have on occasion listened to a segment of the morning show called ‘Ryans Roses’ where women send email/fax or call in their relationship issues. Basically a woman or a man calls in because they are not sure about the fidelity of the guy (or gal) they are dating/married to and wants to lay their doubts to rest. After authorizing the show, a call is placed by the show to the unsuspecting spouse/significant other and an offer of free roses is made which they can send to anyone in the continental US of course the ‘florist’ needs the name and address of the recipient as well as a message to go on the card. The call can go either of two routes after the recipient of the roses has been established. Profuse apologies are offered (and I imagine a lot of off-air make up sex) if the recipient of the roses and the person who initiated the Ryan’s Roses call are one and the same or abuses and a lot of on air drama if not. On Friday Lupe called the show. She had been dating this guy for sometime and she needed to know where she stood with him. He had been making promises but nothing seemed to be forthcoming and oh, he is married! Donkey! Why do women do these things to themselves? Men are not as noble as we like to think, if a guy is tired of a relationship in as much as his partner is not his meal ticket he really doesn’t need too much persuasion to move forward. I have heard the old ‘I am only here cos of my kids’ line but ehn … I don’t know. Apparently this particular guy had been promising to leave his wife (spinning her the ol’ yarns) and she chopped his lines so much she broke up with all her friends and introduced him to her parents (as what abi?) etc etc and now 2 yrs later she has a really bad taste in her mouth and needs a huge dose of public humiliation to see what is obvious to the rest of us; she is just a jump off that homebody is recycling like rain water. So the call is made and like a good boy who just got tired of eating ‘rice’ all the time he asks that the roses be sent to his ‘lovely wife Marie’ with a message worthy of any loving husband. he donkey (Lupe) was furious. At this point Ryan butts in and tells homeboy what is really going on and asks who Lupe is to him. Y’all think Doug E Fresh can beatbox? Yo Doug E aint got nothing on this Cassanova. I haven’t heard so much scratching since the 80’s! The guy sef no get any kin game, if na me wo I go deny sotay de girl sef go begin second guess herself by the time I am through with her she will be apologising to me! Anyway, moving on ... After what seemed like an eternity (I was on the verge of putting my car in park in the middle of the 405, climbing on to the roof and breaking out in a break-dance routine no point wasting his beat-boxing/stammering) when he manages to stammer out that Lupe is his friend and after further coaxing admitted they where ‘romantically platonic’ friends. I am laughing so hard by now I can hardly see. Of course every married woman in LA is calling in to the show by this time (I bet the boards hadn’t seen so many calls prior), and the ones who made it on to the air were doing a damn good job of yapping our poor damsel in distress. Me sef, I don reach for my phone to deliver some choice words when I realized that I wouldn’t be connected; the 1-800 number would only connect local (California) numbers. Chei! Could this be the reason? Is this why my friends always change their numbers when they move? I figured they must have been trying to give bill collectors the slip or something but I think I have hit gold here. I mean the ability to call in to local morning radio shows and add your 2 cents to whatever issue is on hand sure as hell beats buying a cat. Perhaps. I am quick to realize though that it would take more than Lupe the Donkey and her inability to realize her jump off status to get me to go through all the wahala. And I am hardly in danger of buying a cat (not a huge fan of animals up close and personal). Besides why bother when I can blog about it?

23 June 2007

Its about time

Sad to see you go, I do understand your quest for the elusive Champions League title. I wish you all the best with Barca.

Thierry Henry headed to Barcelona sportingnews.com

07 June 2007

OMG!

Eni ba je gbese da oran (Whoever owes is in trouble). This statement is usually made by my people when contemplating how fast time has gone by. Today marks the 1st anniversary of my departure from Nija. I can hardly believe it, one year ago today I overdosed on 'liver', packed up my suitcases kissed Princess and Bee so long and hopped on the plane. I must say the past year has been a great experience I really have a lot to be thankful to God for; the courage to just trust Him and launch out into the deep, He not denying Himself and waiting on the other side to catch me, raising people to help me, get me settled in and all, taking care of Princess and Bee (so much so I fear they don't even know I am gone!). I am really grateful. I would like to say a big thank you to my friends who opened up their homes, lives, friends and family to me, may God continue to bless you and may you always find a helping hand. Today I face the coming year not with as much fear as the preceding one and with a lot more hope

06 June 2007

He is back!

Raphael is back!!!

I did a little cheer as he hobbled out from the back room. He looks a little tired and all that, his eyes looked a little tired, poor thing. The deli was busy so we didn't get a chance to do do more than say hello and keep it moving. I'll go down later to buy chips or something to catch up. By the way, my sandwich is great!

05 June 2007

Lunch has no been the same ...

Raphael has not been in to work for almost two weeks.

I skipped downstairs last week for my usual sandwich and he wasn't there. Julio made my sandwich and it wasn't too bad, it was owever missing the Raphael touch (whatever that is). Well there is always tomorrow. Tomorrow comes again no Raphael. 'May I take your order ma'am?' Asked a strange guy. Oh no! Has Raphael been fired? Did he resign and not tell me? So many questions, relax, I am sure it is none of the above he probably just has some time off work and no this stranger is not 'replacing' him like that. Besides there is a more pressing issue to contemplate, do I really want the new guy making my sandwich? How can I get out of this? It would not be polite of me to ignore him or ask that another person attend to me, plus this is where I eat, I really don't need to be making enemies here before they start serving sandwich wit a side order of spit. And the yeye man wasn't helping matters at all, being earnest and everything, drat. I am between a rock and a hard place here, I placed my order. I watched in horror as he slapped my sandwich together OMG! Not the tomato slices directly on the bread, don't you know that will make the bread all soggy!? You for try squish the avoado a little before adding it to the sandwich that way it wll help hold the bacon to the bread not fall out in chunks as you are masacaring my sandwich under the guise of cutting it up! I couldn't watch anymore! I muttered my thanks and paid for my food. Na dustbin get this sandwich I thought to myself, watching the guy put it together was traumatic enough, I didn't think I could put my stomach through the ordeal of digesting it. 'Speak for yourself honey' my stomach growled as my hand hovered over the trash. I had a meeting in 30 mins with clients from out of town. The nearest 'Subway' is like a 20 mins walk away in the 'upstairs' (4 inch platforms) I am wearing. And today is the day I decide to leave home without my trusty Nature Valley bar. And dis my belle sabi embarrass person, na so de yeye thing go begin dey make noise like say I swallow lion, loud and long growls. I no get choice, I proceeded to eat the messiest sandwich I have ever laid eyes on. Picking the thing up from the Styrofoam box no be small work, taking a bite out of it nko? At one point na im I just give up begin to use fork eat am. I managed to eat half of it and threw the rest in the bin. At least my belle no go embarrass me for meeting.


Note to self: I am a paying customer, I should get my money's worth. Next time that guy attempts to make me a sandwich I will politely decline. Raphael oh Raphael, where art thou? Please hasten to me lest I fade away into the woodwork from lack of proper nutrition

Next day I am bobbing and weaving the minute I got off the elevator. No Raphael! Where is Raphael? Why is he doing this to me!? Thankfully Julio was on hand to rescue me from the new guy. I was pleased to see he had learned to cut my sandwich just right (the Raphael way). 'Julio, where is Raphael?' 'Oh Raphael, he fall, he in hospital' 'What?!' That came out a little louder than I had intended, but I couldn't help myself. 'Is he alright?' 'Yeah, he hurt his knee, he phoned today' Thank God! Its not like he is unconscious or anything like that. 'Could you tell him I said hello and get well soon?' and I miss him and who told him he had the right to be falling down and hurting himself and get himself all hospitalized leaving me without a lovingly made sandwich for lunch? 'Sure' Julio replies with a smile and twinkling eyes. Na you sabi, sha greet him for me. Everyday I go down for lunch, my heart is in my mouth, is he back? As at this afternoon he is not AND I learn today he might be having surgery. Eya. Get well soon o, lunch has not been the same and I really don't know for how long I can avoid the new guy without making an enemy of him. I think I am going to take lunch to work tomorrow.