05 June 2007

Lunch has no been the same ...

Raphael has not been in to work for almost two weeks.

I skipped downstairs last week for my usual sandwich and he wasn't there. Julio made my sandwich and it wasn't too bad, it was owever missing the Raphael touch (whatever that is). Well there is always tomorrow. Tomorrow comes again no Raphael. 'May I take your order ma'am?' Asked a strange guy. Oh no! Has Raphael been fired? Did he resign and not tell me? So many questions, relax, I am sure it is none of the above he probably just has some time off work and no this stranger is not 'replacing' him like that. Besides there is a more pressing issue to contemplate, do I really want the new guy making my sandwich? How can I get out of this? It would not be polite of me to ignore him or ask that another person attend to me, plus this is where I eat, I really don't need to be making enemies here before they start serving sandwich wit a side order of spit. And the yeye man wasn't helping matters at all, being earnest and everything, drat. I am between a rock and a hard place here, I placed my order. I watched in horror as he slapped my sandwich together OMG! Not the tomato slices directly on the bread, don't you know that will make the bread all soggy!? You for try squish the avoado a little before adding it to the sandwich that way it wll help hold the bacon to the bread not fall out in chunks as you are masacaring my sandwich under the guise of cutting it up! I couldn't watch anymore! I muttered my thanks and paid for my food. Na dustbin get this sandwich I thought to myself, watching the guy put it together was traumatic enough, I didn't think I could put my stomach through the ordeal of digesting it. 'Speak for yourself honey' my stomach growled as my hand hovered over the trash. I had a meeting in 30 mins with clients from out of town. The nearest 'Subway' is like a 20 mins walk away in the 'upstairs' (4 inch platforms) I am wearing. And today is the day I decide to leave home without my trusty Nature Valley bar. And dis my belle sabi embarrass person, na so de yeye thing go begin dey make noise like say I swallow lion, loud and long growls. I no get choice, I proceeded to eat the messiest sandwich I have ever laid eyes on. Picking the thing up from the Styrofoam box no be small work, taking a bite out of it nko? At one point na im I just give up begin to use fork eat am. I managed to eat half of it and threw the rest in the bin. At least my belle no go embarrass me for meeting.


Note to self: I am a paying customer, I should get my money's worth. Next time that guy attempts to make me a sandwich I will politely decline. Raphael oh Raphael, where art thou? Please hasten to me lest I fade away into the woodwork from lack of proper nutrition

Next day I am bobbing and weaving the minute I got off the elevator. No Raphael! Where is Raphael? Why is he doing this to me!? Thankfully Julio was on hand to rescue me from the new guy. I was pleased to see he had learned to cut my sandwich just right (the Raphael way). 'Julio, where is Raphael?' 'Oh Raphael, he fall, he in hospital' 'What?!' That came out a little louder than I had intended, but I couldn't help myself. 'Is he alright?' 'Yeah, he hurt his knee, he phoned today' Thank God! Its not like he is unconscious or anything like that. 'Could you tell him I said hello and get well soon?' and I miss him and who told him he had the right to be falling down and hurting himself and get himself all hospitalized leaving me without a lovingly made sandwich for lunch? 'Sure' Julio replies with a smile and twinkling eyes. Na you sabi, sha greet him for me. Everyday I go down for lunch, my heart is in my mouth, is he back? As at this afternoon he is not AND I learn today he might be having surgery. Eya. Get well soon o, lunch has not been the same and I really don't know for how long I can avoid the new guy without making an enemy of him. I think I am going to take lunch to work tomorrow.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hmmmmm... you have given Raphael so much air time, i am beginning to think "its just, a little crush....."
Tee hee hee

Modupe

Akin said...

Oh! I'm not infatuated with my sandwich maker - the first line to a long poem about Raphael.

Methinks Modupe is on the right track here.

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mochafella said...

Raphael, what hath thou wrought.